Showing posts with label Muslimah. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Muslimah. Show all posts

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Lauren Booth explains why she fell in love with Islam

LAUREN Booth, a broadcaster, journalist and sister-in-law of former British Prime Minister Tony Blair, defiantly explains her conversion to Islam.

"It is the most peculiar journey of my life. The carriage is warm and my fellow passengers unexpectedly welcoming. We are progressing rapidly and without delay. Rain, snow, rail unions, these things make no difference to the forward rush.

Yet I have no idea how I came to be on board nor, stranger still, quite where the train is heading, apart from this: the destination, wherever it might be, is the most important place I can imagine.

I know this all seems gloriously far-fetched, but really it is how I feel about my conversion, announced last week, to Islam.

Although the means and mechanisms that brought me to this point remain mysterious, the decision will determine every aspect of my life to come as firmly as the twin rails beneath that exhilarating express.

Asked for a simple explanation of how I, an English hack journalist, a single working mother, signed up to the Western media’s least-favourite religion, I suppose I would point to an intensely spiritual experience in an Iranian mosque just over a month ago.

But it makes more sense to go back to January 2005, when I arrived alone in the West Bank to cover the elections there for The Mail on Sunday. It is safe to say that before that visit I had never spent any time with Arabs, or Muslims.

The whole experience was a shock, but not for the reasons I might have expected. So much of what we know about this part of the world and the people who follow Mohammed the Prophet is based on disturbing - some would say biased - news bulletins.

So, as I flew towards the Middle East, my mind was full of the usual 10pm buzz words: radical extremists, fanatics, forced marriages, suicide bombers and jihad. Not much of a travel brochure.

My very first experience, though, could hardly have been more positive. I had arrived on the West Bank without a coat, as the Israeli airport authorities had kept my suitcase.

Walking around the centre of Ramallah, I was shivering, whereupon an old lady grabbed my hand.

Talking rapidly in Arabic, she took me into a house on a side street. Was I being kidnapped by a rather elderly terrorist? For several confusing minutes I watched her going through her daughter’s wardrobe until she pulled out a coat, a hat and a scarf.

I was then taken back to the street where I had been walking, given a kiss and sent warmly on my way. There had been not a single comprehensible word exchanged between us.

Warmth of spirit

It was an act of generosity I have never forgotten, and one which, in various guises, I have seen repeated a hundred times. Yet this warmth of spirit is so rarely represented in what we read and see in the news.

Over the course of the next three years I made numerous journeys to the occupied lands which were once historic Palestine. At first I went on assignments; as time went by, I started travelling in solidarity with charities and pro-Palestinian groups.

I felt challenged by the hardships suffered by Palestinians of all creeds. It is important to remember there have been Christians in the Holy Land for 2000 years and that they too are suffering under Israel’s illegal occupation.

Gradually I found expressions such as ‘Mashallah!’ (a phrase of gratitude meaning ‘God has willed it’) and ‘Al Hamd illilah!’ (akin to ‘Halle lujah’) creeping into my everyday speech. These are exclamations of delight derived from the 100 names of God, or Allah. Far from being nervous of Muslim groups, I started looking forward to meeting them. It was an opportunity to be with people of intelligence, wit and, above all else, kindness and generosity.

I’m going to take a break here to pray for 10 minutes as it’s 1.30pm. (There are five prayers each day, the times varying throughout the year depending on the rising and setting of the sun.)

I was in no doubt that I had embarked on a change of political understanding, one in which Palestinians became families rather than terror suspects, and Muslim cities communities rather than ‘collateral damage’.

But a religious journey? This would never have occurred to me. Although I have always liked to pray and, since childhood, have enjoyed the stories of Jesus and the more ancient prophets that I had picked up at school and at the Brownies, I was brought up in a very secular household.

Bold Muslim women

It was probably an appreciation of Muslim culture, in partic ular that of Muslim women, that first drew me towards a broader appreciation of Islam.

How strange Muslim women seem to English eyes, all covered up from head to toe, sometimes walking behind their husbands (although this is far from universally the case), with their children around their long skirts.

By contrast, professional women in Europe are happy to make the most of their appearance. I, for example, have always been proud of my lovely blonde hair and, yes, my cleavage.

It was common working practice to have this on display at all times because so much of what we sell these days has to do with our appearance.

Yet whenever I have been invited to broadcast on television, I have sat watching in wonder as the female presenters spend up to an hour on their hair and make- up, before giving the serious topics under discussion less than 15 minutes’ attention. Is this liber ation? I began to wonder just how much true respect girls and women get in our ‘free’ society.

In 2007 I went to Lebanon. I spent four days with female university students, all of whom wore the full hijab: belted shirts over dark trousers or jeans, with no hair on show. They were charming, independent and outspoken company. They were not at all the timid, soon-to-be-forced-into-marriage girls I would have imagined from what we often read in the West.

At one point they accompanied me to interview a sheikh who was also a commander with the Hezbollah militia. I was pleasantly surprised by his attitude to the girls. As Sheikh Nabil, in turban and brown flowing robes, talked intriguingly of a prisoner swap, they started butting in. They felt free to talk over him, to put a hand up for him to pause while they translated.

In fact, the bossiness of Muslim women is something of a joke that rings true in so many homes in the community. You want to see men under the thumb? Look at many Muslim husbands more than other kinds.

Indeed, just yesterday, the Grand Mufti of Bosnia rang me and only half-jokingly introduced himself as ‘my wife’s husband’.

Something else was changing, too. The more time I spent in the Middle East, the more I asked to be taken into mosques. Just for touristy reasons, I told myself. In fact I found them fascinating.

Mosques 'fascinating'

Free of statues and with rugs instead of pews, I saw them rather like a big sitting room where ­children play, women feed their families pitta bread and milk and grandmothers sit and read the Koran in wheelchairs. They take their lives into their place of worship and bring their worship into their homes.

Then came the night in the Iran ian city of Qom, beneath the golden dome of the shrine of Fatima Mesumah (the revered ‘Learned Lady’). Like the other women pilgrims, I said Allah’s name several times while holding on to the bars of Fatima’s tomb.

When I sat down, a pulse of sheer spiritual joy shot through me. Not the joy that lifts you off the ground, but the joy that gives you complete peace and contentment. I sat for a long time. Young women gathered around me talking of the ‘amazing thing happening to you’.

I knew then I was no longer a tourist in Islam but a traveller inside the Ummah, the community of Islam that links all believers.

At first I wanted the feeling to go, and for several reasons. Was I ready to convert? What on earth would friends and family think? Was I ready to moderate my behaviour in many ways?

And here’s the really strange thing. I needn’t have worried about any of these things, because somehow becoming a Muslim is really easy – although the prac ticalities are a very different ­matter, of course.

For a start, Islam demands a great deal of study, yet I am mother to two children and work full-time. You are expected to read the Koran from beginning to end, plus the thoughts and findings of imams and all manner of spiritually enlightened people. Most people would spend months, if not years of study before making their declaration.

People ask me how much of the Koran I’ve read, and my answer is that I’ve only covered 100 pages or so to date, and in translation. But before anyone sneers, the verses of the Koran should be read ten lines at a time, and they should be recited, considered and, if possible, committed to memory. It’s not like OK! magazine.

This is a serious text that I am going to know for life. It would help to learn Arabic and I would like to, but that will also take time.

I have a relationship with a couple of mosques in North London, and I am hoping to make a routine of going at least once a week. I would never say, by the way, whether I will take a Sunni or a Shia path. For me, there is one Islam and one Allah.

Adopting modest dress, however, is rather less troublesome than you might think. Wearing a headscarf means I’m ready to go out more quickly than before. I was blushing the first time I wore it loosely over my hair just a few weeks ago.

Luckily it was cold outside, so few people paid attention. Going out in the sunshine was more of a challenge, but this is a tolerant country and no one has looked askance so far.

A veil, by the way, is not for me, let alone something more substantial like a burka. I’m making no criticism of women who choose that level of modesty. But Islam has no expectation that I will adopt a more severe form of dress.

Predictably, some areas of the Press have had a field day with my conversion, unleashing a torrent of abuse that is not really aimed at me but a false idea of Islam.

But I have ignored the more negative comments. Some people don’t understand spirituality and any discussion of it makes them frightened. It raises awkward questions about the meaning of their own lives and they lash out.

One of my concerns is professional. It is easy to get pigeonholed, particularly if I continue to wear a headscarf. In fact, based on the experience of other female converts, I’m wondering if I will be treated as though I have lost my mind.

I’ve been political all my life, and that will continue. I’ve been involved in pro-Palestinian activism for a number of years, and don’t expect to stop. Yet Britain is a more tolerant country than, say, France or Germany.

I’m well aware that there are plenty of Muslim women who have great success on television and in the Press, and wear modest but decidedly Western dress.

This is hardly a choice for me, though. I am a newcomer, still getting to grips with the basic tenets. My relationship with Islam is different. I am in no position to say that some bits of my new-found faith suit me and that some bits I’ll ignore.

There is a more profound uncertainty about the future, too. I feel changes going on in me every day – that I’m becoming a different person. I wonder where that will end up. Who will I be?

I am fortunate in that my most important relationships remain strong. The reaction from my non-Muslim friends has been more curious than hostile. "Will it change you?" they ask. "Can we still be your friend? Can we go out drinking?"

The answer to the first two of those questions is yes. The last is a big happy no.

As for my mother, I think she is happy if I’m happy. And if, coming from a background of my father’s alcoholism, I’m going to avoid the stuff, then what could be better?

Alcoholic household

Growing up in an alcoholic household with a dad who was violent, has left a great gap in my life. It is a wound that will never heal and his remarks about me are very hurtful.

We haven’t seen each other for years, so how can he know anything about me or have any valid views about my conversion? I just feel sorry for him. The rest of my family is very supportive.

My mum and I had a difficult relationship when I was growing up, but we have built bridges and she’s a great support to me and the girls.

When I told her I had converted, she did say: "Not to those nutters. I thought you said Buddhism!" But she understand now and accepts it.

And, as it happens, giving up alcohol was a breeze. In fact I can’t imagine tasting alcohol ever again. I simply don’t want to.

This is not the time for me to be thinking about relationships with men, either. I’m recovering from the breakdown of my marriage and am now going through a divorce.

So I’m not looking and am under no pressure to look.

If, when the time came, I did consider remarrying, then, in accordance with my adopted faith, the husband would need to be Muslim.

I’m asked: "Will my daughters be Muslim?" I don’t know, that is up to them. You can’t change someone’s heart. But they’re certainly not hostile and their reaction to my surprising conversion was perhaps the most telling of all.

I sat in the kitchen and called them in. "Girls, I have some news for you," I began. "I am now a Muslim." They went into a huddle, with the eldest, Alex, saying: "We have some questions, we’ll be right back."

They made a list and returned. Alex cleared her throat. "Will you drink alcohol any more?"

Answer: No. The response - a rather worrying "Yay!"

"Will you smoke cigarettes any more?" Smoking isn’t haram (for bidden) but it is harmful, so I answered: "No."

Again, this was met with puritanical approval. Their final question, though, took me aback. "‘Will you have your breasts out in public now you are a Muslim?"

What??

It seems they’d both been embarrassed by my plunging shirts and tops and had cringed on the school run at my pallid cleavage. Perhaps in hindsight I should have cringed as well.

"Now that I’m Muslim," I said, "I will never have my breasts out in public again."

"We love Islam!" they cheered and went off to play. And I love Islam too."

Lauren Booth, 43, the sixth daughter of actor Tony Booth, now works for Press TV, the English-language news channel of the Islamic Republic of Iran

Source: forwarded email

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

The Scimitar and the Veil: Extraordinary Women of Islam

Author Heath, Jennifer.
Title The scimitar and the veil : extraordinary women of Islam / Jennifer Heath.
Publisher Mahwah, N.J. : Hidden Spring, c2004.
I. "Paradise lies at the feet of the mothers" : in the beginning : women of the prophetate -- II. "That does not come from you, but from her behind the curtain" : scholars of the Hadith -- III. "Be like wax and illumine the world. Be like a needle and work naked" : ascetics, saints, and mystics -- IV. "If you do not fall in battle, someone is saving you as a token of shame" : warriors and amazons -- V. "Drink from this cup, then be gracious to her who sent it by paying a visit after sunset" : rebels and concubines -- VI. "Listening stirs the heart to see god" : musicians and dancers -- VII. "We have left the account for the day of accountings" : rulers, regents, queen mothers, and philanthropists -- VIII. "To educate a woman is to educate the whole world ..." : tradeswomen and learned ladies -- IX. "Enjoy life! Who cares what people say?" : poets -- The five pillars of Islam.


The Scimitar and the Veil is a book written to introduce, and perhaps improve the perceptions of Western people on Muslim women. It accounts very comprehensively the history of famous or at least recorded Muslim women from the first woman to become a Muslim (Khadijah bint Khuwaylid RA) to queens, poets and tradeswomen of the 19th century.

So it is a very comprehensive book, around 465 pages.. and took me 2 months to finish reading it. And what do I think about it?


Well, the author has really gone to great lengths to research and write on these remarkable Muslim women. I became very engaged in the beginning, in the first section on the first Muslim women, those whose lives are personally touched by the physical presence of Prophet Muhammad SAW. How lucky they are to know him personally.. and to be loved by him! I've read before their stories, especially Prophet Muhammad SAW's wives or Ummul Mu'minin, such as Khadijah bint Khuwaylid RA and Aisyah bint Abu Bakr RA, but I was never able to really engage with it. I guess the stories or books I read were more of a historical account. What is different about this book is that it is (sometimes overly) romanticised. It actually portrayed the personal feelings of these women. Like how Khadijah RA dreamed of Muhammad SAW. It was told in this book that she went up to the roof of her house to get some air, then she watched a group of traders walked past and saw that Muhammad SAW was shining. It accounted, with dialogue, how anxious she was after she proposed to Muhammad SAW. And the part about Aisyah RA were also documented in such a way that I could actually feel what she was feeling and really could imagine what she is like. So it wasn't like reading a textbook (I used to feel this way when reading the previous books on Ummul Mu'minin).


Although, I'm sure a lot of people, particularly Muslim, would object that such great women are portrayed in this way. I mean who really knows for sure that Khadijah actually said or thought, or what the other Ummul Mu'minin thought in their hearts. So I think some of the dialogues are made up, just to spice up the story.. but I love it! I imagine too that those reading this book, especially women, would want a romantic story rather than a textbook-like account.


Other extraordinary women that were portrayed were scholars, warriors, queens, rulers, queen-mothers, tradeswomen, mystics, etc.. but mostly it really showed its "girl power" promise through the accounts of women warriors and rulers. I think the author is trying to say that "girls can really rawk" by going to war and even ruling a whole kingdom and be in power over men. Well, okay. I'm not really into this part. I don't like any accounts of war of violence, especially when women are involved. As for women leaders, well, surprisingly, I'm not into that either. I am totally into girl power, but I believe sometimes women and men have their place, naturally.


I'm not saying I oppose of women leaders and warriors. Just not interested. I am more interested in women who tend to their family more, and do it in piety of Allah and really happy doing it. Now that's girl power. ;)


I'm also not able to engage with chapters III, V and VI on saints/mystics, rebels/concubines and musicians/dancers respectively. Chapter III told about Muslim women ascetics or mystics, or in Islam we call them Sufi. Personally, I don't really approve of Sufism or those who submit to Islam in such a way they ignore other people or the environment around them. As if the only thing matters is their relationship to Allah SWT. Islam, in my view, is a very communal and social religion. That is why it is so comprehensive. So this chapter tells Muslim women, who, through their constant devotion in praying, crying, loving Allah SWT were able to perform miracles. Hmm.. really? I'm a bit skeptic on this.


The chapter on rebels and concubines also didn't appeal to me. Who likes the word "rebel" and "concubine" and have them associated with Muslim woman? Not me. Especially how they stated that Prophet Muhammad SAW had a concubine who was a Christian, Maria al-Qibtiyyah. If concubine here means it is a "secondary wife", then fine. But if it means a woman who is not legally married to him, but cohabits with him.. then I'm a bit concerned. The concubines that were portrayed here were those "residing in a harem and kept, as by a sultan, for sexual purposes". *sigh* Are men allowed to do this? And they are sultan, too! Those with high power. Isn't this zina? Although it is interesting to read about the politics going on in the harem with these concubines, I am a bit upset how it is connected to Islam with its strict sanction of zina. The next chapter on musicians and dancers also gave me a similar feeling with the previous chapter, as musicians and dancers are mostly associated with concubines who had these talents to be presented to please her master or sultan.


To be honest, the only chapter I thoroughly enjoyed was the first one. Towards the end it got boring for me, since it was too long and maybe I just got bored, so I started skipping pages, stories, and sometimes a whole chapter. The last chapter I didn't even bother to read. But I was able to read the part of how the person responsible for trades in Aceh and Gresik are women! I think that's the only time Southeast Asian women were mentioned. Which was sad, Cut Nyak Dien or RA Kartini should have had their places in this book. Most women portrayed originated from the Middle East, Africa or East Asia. Which got me thinking, if a similar book were to be written on Muslim women 20th century onwards..would Indonesia have gained more portion? After all, we are the largest Muslim country in the world...



Nevertheless, although there were some points I didn't agree on, I do agree this book is quite a treasure. Those wanting to learn about real Muslim women in history should read this book, especially women. Though I don't recommend it to men.. they might get boring reading the romanticised parts and may get the wrong ideas on the parts about concubines, polygamy, etc.


And I would just like to clarify some points that could be misleading Islam in this book:

1. Although in Islam polygamy is allowed, as stated in the Qur'an, but the conditions of it have to be met, i.e. the man is able to be just to his wives in all cases, the latter marriage is endorsed by the previous wife, etc.
2. Having concubines, meaning women not legally married to a man but can be involved in sexual relationships with them, are not allowed in Islam. This is called zina, and the sanction in the Qur'an is very severe. In fact, it is said one of the reasons polygamy can be allowed is to prevent committing the sin of zina.
3. The consumption of alcohol for drinks is prohibited in Islam. In this book the characters were described as drinking wine and even getting drunk. Prohibition of alcohol is debatable, though, some say that if it is in an amount that is not dangerous i.e. doesn't get the person drunk, then it is okay. As long as they don't get drunk. But for me, no alcoholic drinks (please note, it's drinks! not legal medicines) can go through my throat, thank you!
4. On the veil. From my readings, discussions, etc.. I have come to believe that the most important is the veil of the heart, rather than physical veil. But I do really recommend women to wear very decent clothes and not showing their body parts. For me, personally, that is a dignified woman who loves herself and most importantly loves Allah SWT. ;)

Monday, August 30, 2010

Hukum Seorang Wanita Menambahkan Nama Suaminya di Belakang Namanya

Setelah menikah, terkadang seorang wanita mengganti namanya belakangnya atau nama keluarganya dengan nama suaminya. Hal ini juga banyak dilakukan di negara-negara barat, seperti istrinya Bill Clinton: Hillary Clinton yang nama aslinya Hillary Diane Rodham; istrinya Barrack Obama: Michelle Obama yang nama aslinya Michelle LaVaughn Robinson, dan lain-lain.


Lalu bagaimanakah pendapat para ulama tentang masalah ini?

Fatwa Lajnah Da’imah:

Fatawa al-Lajnah ad-Da’imah lil Buhutsil Ilmiyyah wal Ifta’ juz 20 halaman 379.


Pertanyaan :
Telah umum di sebagian negara, seorang wanita muslimah setelah menikah menisbatkan namanya dengan nama suaminya atau laqobnya. Misalnya: Zainab menikah dengan Zaid, Apakah boleh baginya menuliskan namanya : Zainab Zaid? Ataukah hal tersebut merupakan budaya barat yang harus dijauhi dan berhati-hati dengannya?

Jawab :
Tidak boleh seseorang menisbatkan dirinya kepada selain ayahnya.

Alloh subhanahu wa ta’ala berfirman:
ادْعُوهُمْ لِآبَائِهِمْ هُوَ أَقْسَطُ عِنْدَ اللَّهِ
“Panggillah mereka (anak-anak angkat itu) dengan memakai nama bapak-bapak mereka, itulah yang lebih adil di sisi Allah.” [QS al-Ahzab: 5]

Sungguh telah datang ancaman yang keras bagi orang yang menisbatkan kepada selain ayahnya. Maka dari itu tidak boleh seorang wanita menisbatkan dirinya kepada suaminya sebagaimana adat yang berlaku pada kaum kuffar dan yang menyerupai mereka dari kaum muslimin.
وبالله التوفيق، وصلى الله على نبينا محمد وآله وصحبه وسلم
al-Lajnah ad-Da’imah lil Buhutsil Ilmiyyah wal Ifta’
Ketua : Abdul Aziz bin Abdillah bin Baz
Wakil : Abdul Aziz Alu Syaikh
Anggota :
Abdulloh bin ghudayyan
Sholih al-Fauzan
Bakr Abu Zaid
فتاوى اللجنة الدائمةالسؤال الثالث من الفتوى رقم ( 18147 )
س3: قد شاع في بعض البلدان نسبة المرأة المسلمة بعد الزواج إلى اسم زوجها أو لقبه، فمثلا تزوجت زينب زيدا، فهل يجوز لها أن تكتب: (زينب زيد)، أم هي من الحضارة الغربية التي يجب اجتنابها والحذر منها؟
ج3: لا يجوز نسبة الإنسان إلى غير أبيه، قال تعالى: { ادْعُوهُمْ لِآبَائِهِمْ هُوَ أَقْسَطُ عِنْدَ اللَّهِ } (1) وقد جاء الوعيد الشديد على من انتسب إلى غير أبيه. وعلى هذا فلا يجوز نسبة المرأة إلى زوجها كما جرت العادة عند الكفار، ومن تشبه بهم من المسلمين
وبالله التوفيق، وصلى الله على نبينا محمد وآله وصحبه وسلم.
اللجنة الدائمة للبحوث العلمية والإفتاء
عضو … عضو … عضو … نائب الرئيس … الرئيس
بكر أبو زيد … صالح الفوزان … عبد الله بن غديان … عبد العزيز آل الشيخ … عبد العزيز بن عبد الله بن باز
Fatwa Syaikh Sholih al-Fauzan hafidzohulloh

Pertanyaan :
Apakah boleh seorang wanita setelah menikah melepaskan nama keluarganya dan mengambil nama suaminya sebagaimana orang barat?

Jawab :
Hal itu tidak diperbolehkan, bernasab kepada selain ayahnya tidak boleh, haram dalam islam.
Haram dalam islam seorang muslim bernasab kepada selain ayahnya baik laki-laki atau wanita. Dan baginya ancaman yang keras dan laknat bagi yang melakukannya yaitu yang bernasab kepada selain ayahnya hal itu tidak boleh selamanya.

Dari kaset Syarh Mandhumatul Adab Syaikh al-Fauzan Hafidhohulloh
السؤالهل يجوز للمرأة بعد الزواج ان تتنازل عن اسمها العائلي وتاخذ اسم زوجها كما هو الحال في الغرب؟الجواب هذا لا يجوز الانتساب الى غير الاب لا يجوز حرام في الاسلام
حرام في الاسلام ان المسلم ينتسب الى غير ابيه سواءا كان رجلا ام امرأة وهذا عليه وعيد شديد وملعون من فعله الذي ينتسب الى غير مواليه او ينتسب الى غير ابيه هذا لا يجوز ابدا
من شريط شرح منظومة الآداب للشيخ الفوزان حفظه الله
Fatwa Syaikh Muhammad Ali Farkus hafidzohulloh

Pertanyaan :
Apakah wajib secara syar’i bagi seorang wanita menyertakan nama suaminya atau sebisa mungkin tetap menggunakan nama aslinya?

Jawab :
:الحمد لله ربِّ العالمين، والصلاة والسلام على من أرسله الله رحمة للعالمين، وعلى آله وصحبه وإخوانه إلى يوم الدين، أمَّا بعد
Tidak boleh dari segi nasab seseorang bernasab kepada selain nasabnya yang asli atau mengaku keturunan dari yang bukan ayahnya sendiri. Sungguh islam telah mengharamkan seorang ayah mengingkari nasab anaknya tanpa sebab yang benar secara ijma’.

Alloh berfirman :
ادْعُوهُمْ لآبَائِهِمْ هُوَ أَقْسَطُ عِندَ اللهِ فَإِن لَّمْ تَعْلَمُوا آبَاءَهُمْ فَإِخْوَانُكُمْ فِي الدِّينِ وَمَوَالِيكُمْ وَلَيْسَ عَلَيْكُمْ جُنَاحٌ فِيمَا أَخْطَأْتُم بِهِ وَلَكِن مَّا تَعَمَّدَتْ قُلُوبُكُمْ وَكَانَ اللهُ غَفُورًا رَّحِيمًا

Dan sabda nabi shollallohu alaihi wa sallam :
مَنِ ادَّعَى إِلَى غَيْرِ أَبِيهِ أَوْ انْتَمَى إِلَى غَيْرِ مَوَالِيهِ، فَعَلَيْهِ لَعْنَةُ اللهِ وَالمَلاَئِكَةِ وَالنَّاسِ أَجْمَعِينَ، لاَ يَقْبَلُ اللهُ مِنْهُ يَوْمَ القِيَامَةِ صَرْفًا وَلاَ عَدْلاً
“Barang siapa yang mengaku sebagai anak kepada selain bapaknya atau menisbatkan dirinya kepada yang bukan walinya, maka baginya laknat Alloh, malaikat, dan segenap manusia. Pada hari Kiamat nanti, Alloh tidak akan menerima darinya ibadah yang wajib maupun yang sunnah”

Dikeluarkan oleh Muslim dalam al-Hajj (3327) dan Tirmidzi dalam al-Wala’ wal Habbah bab Ma ja’a fiman tawalla ghoiro mawalihi (2127), Ahmad (616) dari hadits Ali bin Abi Tholib rodhiyallohu anhu.

Dan dalam riwayat yang lain :

مَنِ ادَّعَى إِلَى غَيْرِ أَبِيهِ وَهُوَ يَعْلَمُ أَنَّهُ غَيْرُ أَبِيهِ، فَالجَنَّةُ عَلَيْهِ حَرَامٌ
“Barang siapa bernasab kepada selain ayahnya dan ia mengetahui bahwa ia bukan ayahnya, maka surga haram baginya.”

Dikeluarkan oleh Bukhori dalam al-Maghozi bab : Ghozwatuth Tho`if (3982), Muslim dalam “al-Iman” (220), Abu Dawud dalam “al-Adab” (bab Bab Seseorang mengaku keturunan dari yang bukan bapaknya (5113) dan Ibnu Majah dalam (al-Hudud) bab : Bab orang yang mengaku keturunan dari yang bukan bapaknya atau berwali kepada selain walinya (2610) dan Ibnu Hibban (415) dan Darimi (2453) dan Ahmad (1500) dan hadits Sa’ad bin Abi Waqqosh dan Abu Bakroh rodhiyallohu anhuma.

Maka tidak boleh dikatakan : Fulanah bintu Fulan sedangkan ia bukan anaknya, tetapi boleh dikatakan : Fulanah zaujatu Fulan (Fulanah istrinya si Fulan) atau tanggungannya si Fulan atau wakilnya Fulan. Dan jika tidak disebutkan idhofah-idhofah ini -dan hal ini sudah diketahui & biasa- maka sesungguhnya apa-apa yang berlaku dalam adat, itulah yang dipertimbangkan dalam syari’at-.
والعلمُ عند الله تعالى، وآخر دعوانا أنِ الحمد لله ربِّ العالمين، وصلى الله على نبيّنا محمّد وعلى آله وصحبه وإخوانه إلى يوم الدين، وسلّم تسليمًا
Makkah, 4 Syawwal 1427 H
Bertepatan dengan 16 Oktober 2006 M
***
السؤال: هل الواجبُ على المرأةِ حملُ لقبِ زوجِها شرعًا أم بإمكانها البقاء على لقبها الأصليِّ ؟الجوابالحمد لله ربِّ العالمين، والصلاة والسلام على من أرسله الله رحمة للعالمين، وعلى آله وصحبه وإخوانه إلى يوم الدين، أمَّا بعد:
فلا يجوزُ من حيث النسبُ أن يُنْسَبَ المرءُ إلى غير نسبه الأصلي أو يُدَّعَى إلى غير أبيه، فقد حَرَّم الإسلام على الأب أن يُنْكِرَ نَسَبَ ولدِه بغير حقٍّ إجماعًا، لقوله تعالى: ﴿ادْعُوهُمْ لآبَائِهِمْ هُوَ أَقْسَطُ عِندَ اللهِ فَإِن لَّمْ تَعْلَمُوا آبَاءَهُمْ فَإِخْوَانُكُمْ فِي الدِّينِ وَمَوَالِيكُمْ وَلَيْسَ عَلَيْكُمْ جُنَاحٌ فِيمَا أَخْطَأْتُم بِهِ وَلَكِن مَّا تَعَمَّدَتْ قُلُوبُكُمْ وَكَانَ اللهُ غَفُورًا رَّحِيمًا﴾ [الأحزاب: 5]، ولقوله صلى الله عليه وآله وسلم: «مَنِ ادَّعَى إِلَى غَيْرِ أَبِيهِ أَوْ انْتَمَى إِلَى غَيْرِ مَوَالِيهِ، فَعَلَيْهِ لَعْنَةُ اللهِ وَالمَلاَئِكَةِ وَالنَّاسِ أَجْمَعِينَ، لاَ يَقْبَلُ اللهُ مِنْهُ يَوْمَ القِيَامَةِ صَرْفًا وَلاَ عَدْلاً»(١- أخرجه مسلم في «الحج» (3327)، والترمذي في «الولاء والهبة» باب: باب ما جاء فيمن تولى غير مواليه (2127)، وأحمد (616)، من حديث علي بن أبي طالب رضي الله عنه، وفي رواية أخرى: «مَنِ ادَّعَى إِلَى غَيْرِ أَبِيهِ وَهُوَ يَعْلَمُ أَنَّهُ غَيْرُ أَبِيهِ، فَالجَنَّةُ عَلَيْهِ حَرَامٌ»(٢- أخرجه البخاري في «المغازي» باب: غزوة الطائف (3982)، ومسلم في «الإيمان» (220)، وأبو داود في «الأدب» باب: باب في الرجل ينتمي إلى غير مواليه (5113)، وابن ماجه في «الحدود» باب: باب من ادعى إلى غير أبيه أو تولى غير مواليه (2610)، وابن حبان (415)، والدارمي (2453)، وأحمد (1500)، من حديث سعد بن أبي وقاص وأبي بكرة رضي الله عنهما) ، فإذا كان لا يجوز أن يقال: فلانة بنت فلان وهي ليست ابنته، ولكن يجوز أن يقال: فلانة زوجة فلان أو مكفولة فلان أو وكيلة عن فلان، فإذا لم تذكر هذه الإضافات -وكانت معروفة معهودة- «فإنّ ما يجري بالعرف يجري بالشرع».
والعلمُ عند الله تعالى، وآخر دعوانا أنِ الحمد لله ربِّ العالمين، وصلى الله على نبيّنا محمّد وعلى آله وصحبه وإخوانه إلى يوم الدين، وسلّم تسليمًا.
مكة في: 4 شـوال 1427ﻫ
الموافق ﻟ: 26 أكتوبر 2006م
Lalu, Bagaimana yang disyariatkan?

Yang disunnahkan adalah menggunakan nama kunyah (baca: kun-yah), sebagaimana telah tsabit dalam banyak hadits, dan ini jelas lebih utama daripada menggunakan laqob/julukan-julukan yang berasal dari adat barat ataupun ‘ajam. Sebagaimana yang dikatakan oleh syaikh al-Albani rohimahulloh dalam Silsilah al-Ahaadits ash-Shohihah no. 132 :

Rosululloh shollallohu alahi wa sallam bersabda :
اكْتَنِي [بابنك عبدالله – يعني : ابن الزبير] أَنْتِ أُمَّ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ
“Berkun-yahlah [dengan anakmu –yakni: Ibnu Zubair] kamu adalah Ummu Abdillah” [Lihat ash-Shohihah no. 132]

Dikeluarkan oleh al-Imam Ahmad : haddatsana Abdurrozzaq (bin Hammam, pent), haddatsana Ma’mar (bin Rosyid, pent) dari Hisyam (bin ‘Urwah, pent), dari bapaknya (Urwah bin Zubair, pent) : bahwa ‘Aisyah berkata kepada Nabi shollallohu alaihi wa sallam :

يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ كُلُّ نِسَائِكَ لَهَا كُنْيَةٌ غَيْرِي فَقَالَ لَهَا رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ  فذكره بدون الزيادة

“Wahai Rasulullah, semua istrimu selain aku memiliki kun-yah”, lalu Rasulullah shollallohu alaihi wa sallam bersabda kepadanya : (lalu beliau menyebutkan hadits ini tanpa tambahan).

Berkata (Urwah, pent) : Ketika itu ‘Aisyah disebut sebagai Ummu Abdillah sampai ia meninggal dan ia tidak pernah melahirkan sama sekali.

Berdasarkan hadits ini, disyariatkan berkun-yah walaupun seseorang tidak memiliki anak, ini merupakan adab Islami yang tidak ada bandingannya pada ummat lainnya sejauh yang aku ketahui. Maka sepatutnya bagi kaum muslimin untuk berpegang teguh padanya, baik laki-laki maupun wanita, dan meninggalkan apa yang masuk sedkit demi sedikit kepada mereka dari adat-adat kaum ‘Ajam seperti al-Biik (البيك), al-Afnadi (الأفندي), al-Basya (الباشا), dan yang semisal itu seperti al-Misyu (المسيو), as-Sayyid (السيد), as-Sayyidah (السيدة), dan al-Anisah (الآنسة), ketika semua itu masuk ke dalam Islam. Dan para fuqoha’ al-Hanafiyyah telah menegaskan tentang dibencinya al-Afnadi (الأفندي) karena di dalamnya terdapat tazkiyah, sebagaimana dalam kitab ‘Hasyiyah Ibnu Abidin’. Dan Sayyid hanya saja dimutlaqkan atas orang yang memiliki kepemimpinan atau jabatan, dan pada masalah ini terdapat hadits (قوموا إلى سيدكم) “Berdirilah kepada (tolonglah, pent) sayyid kalian”, dan telah berlalu pada nomor 66 (dalam ash-Shohihah, pent) dan tidak dimutlakkan atas semua orang karena ini juga masuk pada bentuk tazkiyah.

Faidah : adapun hadits yang diriwayatkan dari ‘Aisyah rodhiyallohu anha bahwa bahwa ia mengalami keguguran dari Nabi shollallohu alaihi wa sallam, lalu ia menamainya (janin yang gugur tersebut, pent) Abdulloh, dan ia berkun-yah dengannya, maka hadits tersebut bathil secara sanad dan matan. Dan keterangannya ada pada adh-Dho’ifah jilid ke-9. -Selesai perkataan syaikh al-Albani rohimahulloh-

Maroji‘:
alifta.net – Fatwa Lajnah Da’imah
Sahab.net – Fatwa Syaikh Sholeh Fauzan
Ferkous.com – Fatwa Syaikh Farkus
Tholib.wordpress.com – Perkataan Syaikh al-Albani
***

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Pentingnya Pendidikan Perempuan (part 2)

Sebelum saya membahas lebih lanjut tentang pentingnya pendidikan perempuan, saya akan menjelaskan mengapa saya memakai istilah "perempuan", ketimbang "wanita". Dalam kosakata sehari-hari pun, saya menghindari menggunakan "wanita" dan selalu menggunakan kata "perempuan". Karena, konon kata perempuan bisa diartikan menjadi "per-EMPU-an", dimana kata "empu" memiliki makna sebagai seorang/sesuatu yang penting/bernilai, seperti diungkapkan oleh Djauharah Bawazir:
"Apabila kita mengurai kata perempuan, akan kita temukan akar kata empu yang mendapat awalan per dan akhiran an. Sementara kata empu pada kamus bahasa Indonesia susunan W.J.S Poerwodarminto diartikan seagai tuan atau orang ahli. Sedangkan dalam bahasa Jawa, kata empu juga jadi sebutan bagi bagian awal/yang ada lebih dahulu dari beragai temu (bahan bumbu masak atau jamu, seperti kunyit, jahe, kunci, atau lainnya) yang dari situ akan tumbuh tunas-tunas atau disebut juga entik. Empu akan meberikan makanan dan menjaga pertumbuhan tunas-tunas itu sampai mereka siap hidup dipisahkan dari sang empu untuk nantinya merekapun akan menumbuhkan tunas-tunas baru, dan mereka masing-masing akan menjadi empu. Orang  yang ahli membuat jamu pasti  akan mencari empu, bukan entik, karena empu mempunyai kualitas yang luar biasa dibanding dengan entiknya. Baik dari rasa, kandungan maupun khasiatnya. Nah, per-empu-an bisa diartikan sebagai orang terhormat yang mempunyai kualitas luar biasa, dari segi kemampuan, keuletan, kegigihan dan kesabaran, termasuk kesediaan menanggung resiko."
Dengan demikian, menggunakan kata "perempuan" buat saya pribadi memberikan kehormatan sendiri bagi perempuan.

Pendidikan memang penting bagi seluruh manusia. Pendidikan dapat diartikan menjadi tarbiyah, yang berasal dari kata "rabb" yang bisa diartikan menjadi  membina, menjaga, memelihara. Seperti kita ketahui, Rabb adalah salah satu sifat Allah SWT yang senantiasa membina, menjaga dan memelihara segalanya di alam semesta ini. Tarbiyah sendiri menjadi penting dan sesuatu yang dibutuhkan bagi manusia karena beberapa hal. Pertama, manusia pada fitrahnya selalu membutuhkan nasihat. Ini dihubungkan dengan faktor kedua, yaitu bahwa manusia memiliki sifat pelupa, lemah dan bodoh. Karena sifat-sifat inilah manusia terus harus dan pada dasarnya ingin ditempa sehingga menjadi kuat dan baik. Selain itu, yang ketiga, manusia butuh hidup berkelompok. Proses tarbiyah adalah sesuatu yang tidak bisa dilakukan sendirian. Kita butuh orang lain untuk mengajarkan kita, seperti mungkin orang lain butuh kita untuk bisa menunjukkan dia kepada kebaikan.

Mengapa pendidikan menjadi begitu penting, khususnya bagi perempuan? Karena perempuan adalah pembentuk generasi dan menciptakan peradaban. Setiap manusia yang pernah ada di muka bumi ini, kecuali Nabi Adam AS dan Siti Hawa, berasal dari rahim seorang ibu -- seorang perempuan. Adanya kita selama sembilan bulan dikandung di dalam rahim ibu kita, membuat kita memiliki hubungan yang sangat istimewa dengan ibu kita. Anak-anak pun, dalam perkembangannya sangat dipengaruhi oleh ibu, dimulai dari sejak awal proses konsepsinya. Misalnya kondisi kerohanian pada saat pembuahan bisa jadi mempengaruhi perkembangan janin dan proses kelahiran itu sendiri. Maka dari itu dianjurkan kepada pasangan suami-istri yang hendak bersenggama untuk berdoa agar dihindarkan dari setan dan dijadikan hubungan tersebut--dan hasilnya kelak--sebagai rezeki, sebagaimana sabda Rasulullah SAW:
"Seandainya salah seorang diantara kamu apabila ingin berhubungan dengan keluarganya membaca--Allahumma jannibna asy-syaithaan wa jannib asy-syaithaan 'ammaa razaqtanaa, (Ya Allah, jauhkanlah kami dari setan, dan jauhkan pula setan dari rezeki yang engkau anugerahkan kepada kami)--maka jika hasil dari hubungan itu menghasilkan anak, maka setan tidak akan mengganggunya sama sekali." (HR. Bukhari)
 Selain itu, hendaknya kita merujuk kepada firman Allah SWT dalam ayat sbb:
"Istri-istrimu adalah ladang bagimu..." (Q.S. Al Baqarah 2:223)
Firman Allah SWT tersebut mengkiaskan bahwa istri adalah ladang dan suami adalah petaninya. Bibit yang ditanam sang petani, betapapun bagusnya, hanya akan dapat memberikan hasil yang baik saat panen jika ladang yang digarap adalah baik tanahnya. Begitupun dalam kehidupan berkeluarga, anak hasil pembuahan pun akan berkualitas baik apabila tempat yang dikandungnya dalam kondisi yang bagus pula, baik fisik maupun rohaninya. Jika perempuan yang akan menjadi ibu ini dibekali dengan pendidikan/tarbiyah yang baik, maka yang jelas ia akan lebih kaya dalam ilmu dan wawasan. Allah SWT berfirman:
"Hai orang-orang yang beriman, apabila dikatakan kepadamu: "Berlapang-lapanglah dalam majelis", maka lapangkanlah, niscaya Allah akan memberi kelapangan untukmu. Dan apabila dikatakan: "Berdirilah kamu, maka berdirilah, niscaya Allah akan meninggikan orang-orang yang beriman di antaramu dan orang-orang yang diberi ilmu pengetahuan beberapa derajat. Dan Allah Maha Mengetahui apa yang kamu kerjakan." (Q.S. Al Mujaadilah 58:11)
Maka Allah SWT akan meninggikan  derajat orang-orang yang memiliki ilmu pengetahuan, yaitu mereka yang beriman dan menghiasi diri mereka dengan ilmu pengetahuan. Seperti diuraikan M. Quraish Shihab dalam Tafsir Al Mishbah ayat ini, ilmu yang dimaksud disini adalah segala apapun ilmu yang bermanfaat, bukan hanya terbatas pada ilmu agama saja. Rasulullah SAW pun pernah bersabda tentang kedudukan orang berilmu (dan beriman) dibandingkan dengan orang yang beriman saja:
"Kelebihan orang berilmu dibandingkan dengan 'abid (seorang ahli ibadah) adalah tujuh puluh derajat." (HR. Ashbihaani)
Maka ilmu menjadi cahaya dalam langkah manusia, membuat manusia takut dan kagum kepada Allah SWT dan meninggikan derajat manusia. Dengan ilmu, keimanan dapat meningkat, begitupun dengan produktivitas kita. Dalam konteks peranan perempuan di keluarga, dengan ilmu yang dimiliki, perempuan sebagai istri dapat lebih mendukung suami dalam dakwah, dan dapat meraih kesuksesan dalam mendidik anak-anaknya. Ia memiliki pemahaman yang baik tentang menjadi istri yang shalihah, dan senantiasa bahu-membahu bersama suami dalam melaksanakan amar ma'ruf nahi munkar, sebagaimana Allah SWT telah berfirman:
"Dan orang-orang yang beriman, laki-laki dan perempuan, sebagian mereka menjadi penolong bagi sebagian yang lain. Mereka menyuruh (berbuat) yang ma'ruf, dan mencegah dari yang mungkar, melaksanakan salat menunaikan zakat, dan taat kepada Allah dan Rasul-Nya. Mereka akan diberi rahmat oleh Allah. Sunggu, Allah Mahaperkasa, Mahabijaksana." (Q.S. At Taubah 9:71).
Dalam mendidik anak-anaknya, perempuan yang berpendidikan juga memiliki kesempatan yang lebih baik dalam menghasilkan anak-anak menjadi generasi rabbani, shalih dan muslih. Anak-anak tidak hanya menjadi qurrata 'Ayun penyejuk mata dan hati, tetapi juga menjadi rahmat. Keimanan anak-anak dan keturunannya membuat keluarga saling terhubung dalam keimanan baik di dunia, maupun akhirat, sesuai firman Allah SWT: 
"Dan orang-orang yang beriman, dan yang anak cucu mereka mengikuti mereka dalam keimanan, Kami hubungkan anak cucu mereka dengan mereka, dan Kami tiada mengurangi sedikit pun dari pahala amal mereka. Tiap-tiap manusia terikat dengan apa yang dikerjakannya." (Q.S. At Thuur 52:21)
Sehingga sekeluarga pun dapat berkumpul kembali di dalam Surga-Nya, sebagaimana Allah SWT telah berfirman sbb:
"Surga Adn yang mereka masuk ke dalamnya bersama-sama dengan orang-orang yang saleh dari bapak-bapaknya, istri-istrinya dan anak cucunya, sedang malaikat-malaikat masuk ke tempat-tempat mereka dari semua pintu" (Q.S. Ar Ra'd 13:23)
Selain itu, perempuan juga memiliki peranan dalam masyarakat. Selain sebagai pembentuk generasi rabbani, perempuan dalam sendirinya dapat memiliki peranan yang penting sebagai anggota masyarakat. Perempuan yang meraih pendidikan akan lebih kritis dan aware terhadap lingkungannya, berusaha sebaik mungkin untuk memperbaiki kondisi masyarakat dan lingkungan di tempat dia berada. Ini dengan sendirinya juga akan meningkatkan kualitas masyarakat dan peradaban itu sendiri menuju masyarakat yang madani. Akhirul kata, semoga para perempuan lebih semangat dan istiqamah dalam menuntut ilmu yang bermanfaat, dan bagi perempuan yang telah dianugerahi Allah dengan kemampuan dan kekayaan ilmu dan wawasan yang lebih, semoga dapat lebih memanfaatkannya untuk perwujudan rasa cinta dan khasyah, takut dan kagumnya kepada Allah SWT, dan menjadikannya sarana untuk kebaikan ummat dan agamanya.  Allahumma innii audzubika min 'ilmi laa yanfa' (Ya Allah, aku berlindung kepadaMu dari ilmu yang tidak bermanfaat)

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Ukhti Indahkan Jilbabmu

Semangat sekali Wichi nge-blog hari ini. Hehe. Soalnya biasanya suka banyak nemu artikel bagus dlm sehari, jadi diborong deh. Gapapa, yang penting tetap bermanfaat, Insyaالله.

Nah, ini ada tulisan tentang cara berpakaian yang syar'i untuk para Muslimah. Semoga bermanfaat dan barokah. Amin. Here's the article:

Ukhti Indahkan Jilbabmu

April 15th, 2007 by huriyah
Islam adalah ajaran yang sangat sempurna, sampai-sampai cara  berpakaian pun dibimbing oleh Alloh Dzat yang paling mengetahui apa yang terbaik bagi diri kita. Bisa jadi sesuatu yang kita sukai, baik itu berupa model pakaian atau perhiasan pada hakikatnya justru jelek menurut Alloh. Alloh berfirman:
“Boleh jadi kamu membenci sesuatu padahal itu adalah baik bagimu dan boleh jadi kamu menyukai sesuatu padahal sebenarnya itu buruk bagimu, Alloh lah yang Maha mengetahui sedangkan kamu tidak mengetahui.” (Al Baqoroh: 216).

Oleh karenanya marilah kita ikuti bimbingan-Nya dalam segala perkara termasuk mengenai cara berpakaian.

Perintah dari Atas Langit
Alloh Ta’ala memerintahkan kepada kaum muslimah untuk berjilban sesuai syari’at. Alloh berfirman:
“Wahai Nabi katakanlah kepada isteri-isterimu, anak-anak perempuanmu serta para wanita kaum beriman agar mereka mengulurkan jilbab-jilbab mereka ke seluruh tubuh mereka. Yang demikian itu agar mereka mudah dikenal dan tidak diganggu orang. Alloh Maha pengampun lagi Maha penyayang.” (Al Ahzab: 59)



Ketentuan Jilbab Menurut Syari’at

Berikut ini beberapa ketentuan jilbab syar’i ketika seorang muslimah berada di luar rumah atau berhadapan dengan laki-laki yang bukan mahrom (bukan ‘muhrim’, karena muhrim berarti orang yang berihrom) yang
bersumber dari Al Qur’an dan As Sunnah yang shohihah dengan contoh penyimpangannya, semoga Alloh memudahkan kita untuk memahami kebenaran dan mengamalkannya serta memudahkan kita untuk meninggalkan busana yang melanggar ketentuan Robbul ‘alamiin.







Pertama
Pakaian muslimah itu harus menutup seluruh badannya kecuali wajah dan kedua telapak tangan (lihat Al Ahzab: 59 dan An Nuur: 31). Selain keduanya seperti leher dan lain-lain, maka tidak boleh ditampakkan
walaupun cuma sebesar uang logam, apalagi malah buka-bukaan. Bahkan sebagian ulama mewajibkan untuk ditutupi seluruhnya tanpa kecuali-red.

Kedua
Bukan busana perhiasan yang justru menarik perhatian seperti yang banyak dihiasi dengan gambar bunga apalagi yang warna-warni, atau disertai gambar makhluk bernyawa, apalagi gambarnya lambang partai
politik!!!; ini bahkan bisa menimbulkan perpecahan diantara sesama muslimin. Sadarlah wahai kaum muslimin…

Ketiga
Harus longgar, tidak ketat, tidak tipis dan tidak sempit yang mengakibatkan lekuk-lekuk tubuhnya tampak atau transparan. Cermatilah, dari sini kita bisa menilai apakah jilbab gaul yang tipis dan ketat yang banyak dikenakan para mahasiswi maupun ibu-ibu di sekitar kita dan bahkan para artis itu sesuai syari’at atau tidak.

Keempat
Tidak diberi wangi-wangian atau parfum karena dapat memancing syahwat lelaki yang mencium keharumannya. Nabi shollallohu ‘alaihi wa sallam bersabda, “Jika salah seorang wanita diantara kalian hendak ke masjid, maka janganlah sekali-kali dia memakai wewangian.” (HR. Muslim). Kalau pergi ke masjid saja dilarang memakai wewangian lalu bagaimana lagi para wanita yang pergi ke kampus-kampus, ke pasar-pasar bahkan berdesak-desakkan dalam bis kota dengan parfum yang menusuk hidung?! Wallohul musta’an.

Kelima
Tidak menyerupai pakaian laki-laki seperti memakai celana panjang, kaos oblong dan semacamnya. Rosululloh melaknat laki-laki yang menyerupai perempuan dan perempuan yang menyerupai laki-laki (HR. Bukhori)

Keenam
Tidak menyerupai pakaian orang-orang kafir. Nabi senantiasa memerintahkan kita untuk menyelisihi mereka diantaranya dalam masalah pakaian yang menjadi ciri mereka.

Ketujuh
Bukan untuk mencari popularitas. Untuk apa kalian mencari popularitas wahai saudariku? Apakah kalian ingin terjerumus ke dalam neraka hanya demi popularitas semu. Lihatlah isteri Nabi yang cantik Ibunda ‘Aisyah
rodhiyallohu ‘anha yang dengan patuh menutup dirinya dengan jilbab syar’i, bukankah kecerdasannya amat masyhur di kalangan ummat ini?

Wallohul muwaffiq.

Pentingnya Pendidikan Perempuan (part 1)

Pendidikan memang hak asasi manusia, dan seharusnya setiap manusia berhak mendapatkan pendidikan yang layak. Akan tetapi, pendidikan yang lebih utama adalah pendidikan untuk perempuan. Mengapa? Karena perempuan yang terdidik dari segi ilmu pengetahuan duniawi dan agama, akan sangat mensejahterakan masyarakat.

Namun ini jarang sekali dilihat oleh orang-orang. Dikarenakan, mendidik perempuan tidak langsung "terlihat" manfaatnya. Sebenarnya, pendidikan sendiri merupakan investasi jangka panjang. Untuk perempuan, jangkanya jadi lebih panjang lagi, hehe. Seorang perempuan, nantinya akan menjadi seorang ibu. Secara alamiah, yang terjadi seperti itu. Ibu-lah yang akan mendidik anak-anaknya. Jika perempuan sebagai ibu pintar dalam ilmu Al-Qur'an, hadits, terus juga di sekolah dan kuliah nilainya bagus-bagus (hehe), pasti akan lebih bijak dalam mendidik anak-anaknya. Tidak ada yang namanya anak dibunuh atau disiksa orangtuanya seperti yang banyak diberitakan akhir-akhir ini di media. Naudzubillah min dzalik.

Orangtua yang cerdas, akan menghasilkan anak yg cerdas. Begitu seterusnya. Sehingga beberapa generasi akan menjadi cerdas, dan tentunya mampu berkontribusi dalam menciptakan masyarakat yang madani.

Jadi, buat para perempuan dan Muslimah, jangan ragu kalau mau belajar. Dijamin nggak bakal rugi, malah banyak untungnya, dunia dan akhirat, InsyaAllah. Apalagi kalau nanti anak kita jadinya pinter dan shalih dan mendoakan kita, akan terus kita bawa amalnya meski kita sudah dalam kubur.

End of Part 1. Part 2-nya, nanti dibikin kalo Wichi udah pinter ngomongin masalah ini, biar agak serius gitu :)

How الله Values Women

I believe that any Muslim, whether man or woman, are just as noble. But in Islam, there are also differences between a man and a woman. These differences does not mean one is lesser than the other, or one is higher than the other. The differences are there to make men and women complement each other, where one is lacking, the other one has the piece to make a whole.

Even then, women sometimes feel downgraded, and I do feel that there are societies that do not value women as they should. But we should use the word "value" carefully. According to whose values are we judging these discriminations?? If we use الله's values, we will learn that He is the Ever Just, Al-Adli. Men are created the way they are, because they have to be responsible for a lot of things, so Alloh gave him the "strength" and" tools" to make him able to handle those big burdens:
  1. An unmarried man is responsible for his own sins if he has reached adulthood (baligh), whereas for a woman who is not yet married, the father is responsible for her sins.
  2. A married man will be responsible for his own sins and the sins of his wife, his unmarried daughter and his son if he has not reached adulthood (baligh).
  3. A man is responsible for his mother and if he does not take the responsibility, he is committing a sin, especially for the oldest son. This does not apply for the daughter, a woman just need to obwy her husband. When a wife commits an act of good, she receives rewards, but if she commits evil, the sin is taken by her husband.
  4. A man is obliged to provide for his wife, if the wife aids him in earning for their living, the husband has no right to touch his wife's earnings without her consent (whereas the wife has every right for the husband's earnings)
  5. On the day of Judgment, the men will be asked of how he is responsible for 4 women: his wife, his mother, his daughters and his sisters.
  6. Men are obliged to go do jihad fisabilillah.
Whereas for women, her roles and tasks are different, but that does not mean she is "lesser" than men:
  1. A woman must be obedient to her husband, but men are obliged to obey his mother 3 times more than to his father. And isn't a mother a woman?
  2. Women receive less inheritance than men, but the inheritance become solely her right and she is not obliged to share with her husband. Whereas for men, although he receives more part of the inheritance, but he must use that inheritance to provide for his wife and children.
  3. Women painfully carry her children and give birth to them, but when she is giving birth, all of الله's creatures in this earth and the angels pray for her, and if a woman dies while giving birth, her death is syahid and her sins forgiven (small sins).
  4. The responsibility of a woman is borne by 4 men: her husband, her father, her sons and her brothers.
  5. A woman may enter heaven from which door she wishes, given she does 5 daily prayers, Ramadhan fasting, obedient to her husband, and maintain her honour and dignity.
  6. A woman who is obedient to her husband and successfully carry her responsibility to Alloh will receive the reward in the same amount like that who does jihad fisabilillah, without having to use any weapon. 
Yes, I do believe there are discriminations for women. Although that exists in all societies and it is not exclusive to Islam. In fact, Islam is a religion who values women more, look at all the ayat and hadits that refer only to women, or how to treat women. If there are inconsistencies in how Muslims treat women, it is not because of the religion, it isdue to the people trying to practice the dien. It is because some people do not understand, and see things from a limited perspective. Humans are created with limitations, it is because of that, that we must keep learning to find the straight path that leads to اللهthrough His Light, the Qur'an, and through the teachings of our Prophet Rasulullah SAW.

*The list is adapted from this blog.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Yvonne Ridley - How I Came to Love the Veil

Written by Yvonne Ridley   
Tuesday, 31 October 2006
I used to look at veiled women as quiet, oppressed creatures and now I look at them as multi-skilled, multi-talented, resilient women whose brand of sisterhood makes Western feminism pale into insignificance.
POLITICIANS AND JOURNALISTS just love to write about the oppression of women in Islam ... without even talking to the females beneath the veil.

They simply have no idea how Muslim women are protected and respected within the Islamic framework which was built more than 1400 years ago.

Yet, by writing about cultural issues like child brides, female circumcision, honor killings and forced marriages they wrongly believe they are coming from a point of knowledge.

And I am sick of Saudi Arabia being cited as an example of how women are subjigated in a country where they are banned from driving.

The issues above have simply nothing to do with Islam yet they still write and talk about them with an arrogant air of authority while wrongly blaming Islam. Please do not confuse cultural behavior with Islam.
I was asked to write about how Islam allows men to beat their wives. Sorry, not true. Yes, I'm sure critics of Islam will quote random Qur'anic verses or ahadith but all are usually taken out of context. If a man does raise a finger to his wife, he is not allowed to leave a mark on her body ... this is another way of the Qur'an saying; "Don't beat your wife, stupid".

Now let's take a glance at some really interesting statistics, hmm. I can almost hear the words pot, kettle, black. According to the National Domestic Violence Hotline, four million American women experience a serious assault by a partner during an average 12-month period.

On the average, more than three women are murdered by their husbands and boyfriends every day . . . that is nearly 5,500 women battered to death since 9/11.

Some might say that is a shocking indictment on such a civilized society, but before I sound too smug, I would say that violence against women is a global issue. Violent men do not come in any particular religious or cultural category. The reality is that one out of three women around the world has been beaten, coerced into sex or otherwise abused during her lifetime. Violence against women transcends religion, wealth, class, skin color and culture.

However, until Islam came on the scene women were treated as inferior beings. In fact we women still have a problem in the West where men think they are superior. This is reflected in our promotion and wages structure right across the spectrum from cleaners to career women who make it into the boardroom.
Western women are still treated as commodities, where sexual slavery is on the rise, disguised under marketing euphemisms, where womens’ bodies are traded throughout the advertising world. As mentioned before, this is a society where rape, sexual assault, and violence on women is commonplace, a society where the equality between men and women is an illusion, a society where a womens’ power or influence is usually only related to the size of her breasts.

I used to look at veiled women as quiet, oppressed creatures and now I look at them as multi-skilled, multi-talented, resilient women whose brand of sisterhood makes Western feminism pale into insignificance. My views changed after the truly terrifying experience of being arrested by the Taleban for sneaking into Afghanistan in September 2001 wearing the bhurka.

During my 10-day captivity I struck a deal that if they let me go I would read the Quran and study Islam. Against all the odds, it worked and I was released. In return I kept my word but as a journalist covering the Middle East I realized I needed to expand my knowledge of a religion which was clearly a way of life.
And no. I'm not a victim of Stockholm Syndrome. To be a victim you have to bond with your captors. During my imprisonment I spat, swore, cursed and abused my jailers as well as refusing their food and going on hunger strike. I don't know who was happier when I was released - them or me!

Reading the Quran was, I thought, going to be a very simple academic exercise. I was stunned to discover that ut clearly stated women are equal in spirituality, education and worth. A woman’s gift for child birth and child-rearing is very much recognised as a quality and attribute. Muslim women say with pride they are homemakers and housewives.

Furthermore The Prophet (pbuh) said that the most important person in the home was The Mother, The Mother, The Mother. In fact he also said that heaven lies at the feet of the mother. How many women make it into the top 100 power lists for simply being a "great mother"?

With Islam choosing to remain at home and raise children takes on a new dignity and respect in my eyes, similar to those sisters among us who choose to go out to work and have careers and professions.
I then began looking at inheritance, tax, property and divorce laws. This is where Hollywood divorce lawyers probably get their inspiration from. For instance the woman gets to keep what she earns and owns while the man has to stump up half his worth.

Isn’t it funny the way the tabloid media gets very excited over the prospect of some pop or film stars pre-nuptial wedding agreement? Muslim women have had wedding contracts from day one. They can choose if they want to work or not and anything they earn is theirs to spend while the husband has to pay for all the household bills and the upkeep of his family.

Just about everything that feminists strived for in the 70s was already available to Muslim women 1400 years ago.

As I said, Islam dignifies and brings respect to motherhood and being a wife. If you want to stay at home, stay at home. It is a great honor to be a home maker and the first educater of your children.
But equally, the Quran states if you want to work, then work. Be a career woman, learn a profession become a politician. Be what you want to be and excel in what you do as a Muslim because everything you do is in praise of Allah (swt).

There is an excessive, almost irritating concentration or focus on the issue of Muslim womens’ dress particularly by men (both Muslim and non-Muslim).

Yes, it is an obligation for Muslim women to dress modestly but, in addition, there are many other important issues which concern Muslim women today.

And yet everyone obsesses over the hijab. Look, it is part of my business suit. This tells you I am a Muslim and therefore I expect to be treated with respect.

Can you imagine if someone told a Wall Street executive or Washington banker to put on a t-shirt and jeans? He would tell you his business suit defines him during work hours, marks him out to be treated seriously.
And yet in Britain we have had the former Foreign Secretary Jack Straw describing the nikab - the face veil revealing only the eyes - as an unwelcome barrier. When, oh when, will men learn to keep their mouths shut over a woman's wardrobe?

We also had Government Ministers Gordon Brown and John Reid express disparaging remarks about the nikab - both these men come from over the Scottish Borders where men wear skirts!!

Then we had a series of other parliamentarians enter the fray describing the nikab as a barrier for communication. What a load of nonsense. If this was the case can anyone explain to me why cell phones, landlines, emails, text messaging and fax machines are in daily use? Who listens to the radio? No one switches off the wireless because they can not see the face of the presenter.

The majority of sisters I know who choose to wear the nikab are actually white, Western reverts who no longer want the unwelcome attention of those few leering men who will try and confront females and launch into inappropriate behavior. Mind you, there are a couple of London sisters I know who say they wear the nikab at anti-war marches because they can't stand the smell of spliffs.

I am afraid Islamophobia has become the last refuge of the racist scoundrel. But the cowardly, chauvinistic attacks launched - largely by men - is unacceptable to Muslimahs as well as their secular, female sisters from the left.
I was a feminist for many years and now, as an Islamic feminist, I still promote womens' rights. The only difference is Muslim feminists are more radical than their secular counterparts. We all hate those ghastly beauty pageants, and tried to stop laughing when the emergence of Miss Afghanistan in bikini was hailed as a giant leap for women's liberation in Afghanistan.

I've been back to Afghanistan many times and I can tell you there are no career women emerging from the rubble in Kabul. My Afghan sisters say they wish the West would drop its obsession with the bhurka. "Don't try turning me into a career woman, get my husband a job first. Show me how I can send my children to school without fear of them being kidnapped. Give me security and bread on the table," one sister told me.
Young feminist Muslimahs see the hijab and the nikab as political symbols as well as a religious requirement. Some say it is their way of showing the world they reject the excesses of Western lifestyles such as binge drinking, casual sex, drug-taking etc.

Superiority in Islam is accomplished through piety, not beauty, wealth, power, position or sex.
Now you tell me what is more liberating. Being judged on the length of your skirt and the size of your cosmetically enhanced breasts, or being judged on your character, mind and intelligence?
Glossy magazines tell us as women that unless we are tall, slim and beautiful we will be unloved and unwanted. The pressure on teenage magazine readers to have a boyfriend is almost obscene.
Islam tells me that I have a right to an education and it is my duty to go out and seek knowledge whether I am single or married.

No where in the framework of Islam are we told as women that we must do washing, cleaning or cooking for men - but it is not just Muslim men who need to re-evaluate women in their home. Check out this 1992 exert from a Pat Robertson speech revealing his views on empowered women. And then you tell me who is civilized and who is not.

He said: "FEMINISM ENCOURAGES WOMEN TO LEAVE THEIR HUSBANDS, KILL THEIR CHILDREN, PRACTICE WITCHCRAFT, DESTROY CAPITALISM AND BECOME LESBIANS".

Here is an American man living in a pre-Islamic age who needs to modernize and civilize. People like him are wearing a veil and we need to tear that veil of bigotry away so people can see Islam for what it is.

Yvonne Ridley is a British broadcaster who reverted to Islam after being captured by the Taliban. Find out more about her in her website.
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